Food For Love: Hope, Fantasy and Anticipation

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Food For Love: Hope, Fantasy and Anticipation

All love stories start out with the big three: Hope, Fantasy and Anticipation.

In reciprocated, mutualing-falling-in-love love stories, the Hope, Fantasy and Anticipation trifecta create the exciting beginning stage or “honeymoon” phase. But what if there are obstacles? What if the one you love isn’t available, or worse, you’re not sure if they feel the same way? Falling in love is a natural progression and a natural state of being, but….

Love doesn’t really seem to care if you’re already married or committed…Or if the one you love is. Or if they give you mixed signals….

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A Personal Limerence Journal Entry

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A Personal Limerence Journal Entry

Part of the pain of limerence is feeling alone and stuck in a state of shame. It can feel like you’re totally alone. To that end, I want to share some of my own experience as I was reflecting on my mid-point with limerence when I was in a hope/despair cycle with physical symptoms as well as mental and emotional anguish and couldn’t rid myself of the intrusive thoughts and fantasies:

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Limerence: A Love Story Like No Other

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Limerence: A Love Story Like No Other

You are convinced you’ve finally found the missing piece. This is what love is supposed to feel like! Or so the story goes.

You may not know it, but you’ve been brewing a love story. You’ve been quietly cataloging all of the things you find attractive and magnetic in others, what feels like “home” and how you want to love and be loved. Your brain has been clocking the qualities of parents, caregivers, those close to you since you were very young.

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The Three Stages of Limerence

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The Three Stages of Limerence

Limerence is an intense emotional state and experience of being “in love.” It may start out as a “crush” or “infatuation” but can move into an intense all-consuming state either over time or very quickly. Unlike mutual love, limerence can be a distressing one-sided affair of the heart, body and soul. You may not realize what is happening until you are up late googling “obsessive love” because of intrusive, involuntary thoughts and fantasies involving your love interest.

… and find the term you never heard of called… Limerence.

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What is Limerence?

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What is Limerence?

What is LIMERENCE?

More intense than a crush, it’s an all consuming state of BEING IN LOVE. It’s marked by involuntary and obsessive thinking about a love interest that can lead to the highest of highs (when the feelings seem reciprocated) to the lowest of lows (when the doubt and despair sets in).

The euphoria…the despair….limerence is not love, but can be an awakening to love and life.

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